July

It's been a month since I've posted any updates. Well , it's no joke that days seem to be more hectic than before since the day Semester 3 commenced. Lecturers rushing to complete the syllabus , pressurising us to work 24/7 for that goddamm A when in the end , I learned nothing. Absolutely nothing is assimilated. Every single day , I attend classes , listen ( or rather , pretend to ) to lectures , and return to my hostel in the end of the day. This routine is repetitive , and I feel like I'm on a bullet train. Time passes by very fast , I do the same thing everyday , yet I wonder what I actually achieved from the daily hectic routine. It's all pointless. My whole July is wasted , on nothing. There is no significance to everything. How I wish I'm in a dream , because it just feels like nightmare.

Not forgetting that my 19th birthday's on the 2nd. Since it was a Thursday and I was away from home , my housemates celebrated with me. As a person who's skeptical about almost everything , I'd already predicted that they'll throw me a surprise. It's a tradition for me and my housemates , to plan birthday surprises for one another. Coincidentally , it'd been exactly a year since we first met , so we travelled to Alchemist Cafe in SS15 for a mini anniversary celebration.

Once we reached the hostel , I was starting to feel a little lethargic ( I am these days ) so I showered and planned to go to bed early.

The story doesn't stop there. Like I expected , two of my housemates tried to get me to somewhere by coming up with lame excuses. Come on lah , you think I don't know something's going on ? I just followed them downstairs after being bugged for a while. As they directed me to the swimming pool , I saw the lane next to it decorated with balloons. Aha ! I knew it ! I expected my housemates to be there , waiting to pounce on me as I walked down the lane.

Apparently my housemates weren't the only people there. One of my classmates jumped out from his hiding spot and started spraying party strings on me. I shrieked , because I didn't see this coming. My housemates actually invited my classmates to be a part of this plan. Words cannot describe how shocked I was at the moment. I became dumbfounded for a few seconds as my legs trembled.
Walao eh. My housemates outsmarted me. LOLOLOL.

They made me bite the candle lol

I'm really grateful for what you guys had done for me :) It was definitely a memorable day. Not forgetting those who came but left early. 

My ALSCO mates also planned a surprise celebration the day before , in conjunction of Ms Ann's birthday. Now I know why MY bugged me to go . 

I guess that's all about 2nd of July. 

I hate dramas and hate to be in one , yet I was made to be involved in an unnecessary one. Not only I might have lost a close friend , I got myself haters whom I don't even know in the first place. 

I hate it when people have to condemn the way I solve my problem. Hello , it's my problem okay? Are they expecting me to do what seems right to them ? This is why I dislike the idea of conformity. Love it or hate it , my only aim is to achieve a win-win situation. This is between me and the party involved. There's a mutual agreement between us and we're totally cool about it. So people , shut up. Try fitting in my shoes before talking behind my back and making judgements about my actions. I will not stick to what everyone usually do because I am different from them. I have my own ideas and opinions without feeling the need to follow the crowd in order to fit in and whatsoever. Please pay some respect. You do not have the rights to interfere or make pointless criticisms which seem to be 'wise' . Call me 'rude' , 'bitch' , 'devil' and I'll thank you for slapping some sense about the reality into me. Via this drama , things I've never come to know were all exposed , and everyday has been nothing but a surprise. I accepted , but I couldn't pretend that nothing happen. Everything's not gonna be the same as it used to be anymore. 

I'm so sick of people. And dramas. And people. 

July might not be a good month after all, with the national scandal and the reshuffling of Cabinet. Is there still hope for people and also my country ?

I'm starting to doubt my feelings. Maybe I shouldn't have it in the first place. It must be a curse since the same scenario takes place every time. When can this be broken ? Am I destined to lose what I really like ? 

Kthnxbai.