Yet another month.

2 hours to go. To the very first of July. Let's do this :)

Let's make July unforgettable. Let it be magical. Let's make the wildest dream come true.

Challenge accepted.

Hui Shan challenged me to post a blog post in Chinese o.o I'm not really good at Chinese , but anyways , challenge accepted. For those readers who know Chinese , please try to put up with what I wrote down here.                                                                                                                                       你好。大家好。不要笑 ，因为这是我首次打华语。竟然惠珊大姐挑战本小姐，好吧！哈哈哈。多几天就是我的生日。我在想，到底谁会记得？ 很多人呀，是靠面子书来提醒自己他们朋友的生日。我的生日很少人会记。失望？ 习惯就好 ：）我原本不想庆祝 ，因为SPM , 但是妈妈坚持要为我庆祝。随便啦。我好羡慕收到生日惊喜的人，让我想起六年极时，我的好朋友在食堂和我一起庆祝。他们还带食物和一些游戏。Preethi , Sam , Rashmi , Ana and Aly Mae , thanks for everything :) 虽然不算是惊喜啦，但是我好高兴。那年是我人生中度过最开心的生日。这世界上，到底有几多个人会真心永远的记你的生日？我咯 .____. 
有时候觉得自己傻。我对人好，他们也一样的对我好。希望啦。

真心人are endangered . 一下子喜欢她，一下子又有新欢。只有傻人被这种东西骗。

Finally , mission accomplished. I had quite a difficult time choosing the right Chinese words, hope they're correct. This post is about birthday memories , my crappy opinions about sincerity and the wild world. Great attempt Jean.

It's a random crap I came up with so no offence. However , the birthday memory in Standard 6 was one of the best moments in my life :)

Cherish.

Wheee !

Had so much fun at Inti International University Nilai today :) Definitely worth my weekend. It was Discovery Day at Inti , so I gave up my place for the Sunway trip 'cos the workshops there sound more interesting than the one at Sunway. In this event , every participant was required to choose 3 workshops of their choice. I chose forensics , DJ and robotics . Well , it didn't turn out to be my choices. The organizers put me in DJ workshop and electronics engineering workshop. Well I didn't sign up for electronics , but anyway it's still fun :)





Workshop number one. It's generally about mass communications . My other friends went for their respective workshops so I was left with Swi Kei . The mass comm lecturer , Mr Roberto briefed us on mass communication and steps to produce our own programmes . We were then divided into groups of 5 to create a radio programme that lasted for 8 minutes. Well it was awkward looking for members but we managed to find some friendly people to join us. We cooperated well and decided to talk about travelling? LOL . Amirah and I were the DJs . Meanwhile , the others were the radio guests , advertisers , etc. I was freaking out when we were on air . OMG I forgot the Filipino lines Maria taught me :o Anyways , it kinda turned out well. Our group was one of the best 3 groups so each of us were awarded a bottle. We took pictures but unfortunately some pictures were missing due to technical problems of my tab. Glad some pictures were managed to be saved :)


Group members :) They're all awesomely nice people.


DJ J.Lee in da house!


With Mr Roberto :)

After the first workshop , we parted ways. A facilitator sent me to the second workshop . Electronics engineering . Seriously , I know none of the participants. I was late to the workshop so I didn't have a place. I randomly found an empty seat next to two guys and yeah , made friends with them. Coincidently , one of them is Kai Ling's friend LOL. It was definitely fun , learning electronics again like what I did 2 years ago . The challenges were completing a circuit to make the LEDs light up alternately and to set numbers for common cathode seven segment display.A team member of mine , Chin was really good at it man . He completed both challenges in a short period of time? Yeah , that's the reason why our group won. I wanted to help , but seeing how enthusiastic he was , I kept silent and watched the process. I did help with the resistors' values so it's considered help right? HAHA.


Le new friends :)


An example of common cathode seven segment display

I'm too lazy to upload pictures of the outcomes so here's an example from Google X)
I guess that's it . The facilities at Inti aren't as sophisticated as Taylor's but I think it would be a more conducive place to study. No offence , just my opinion. :/

 
Prizes I won from both workshop. Yay !

You left me with question marks.

So I'm doing a lil update on le blog while retrieving files needed for my video project. 
I can't label this project as tiring because it has shown me how the film-making crew work on set. It's definitely not as easy as it seems , so kudos to film makers out there . (Y)

I'm such an emotional freak. Not the type that cries easily , but the type that feels bothered inside.
Most of my friends have that typical sixth sense , but I don't. Are the barriers around me too thick? I have defended myself very well that nobody could actually enter my space.

Maybe I should let it go ?

No one could fathom me really well except for myself. I'm such an introvert. Being too defensive over myself could be so hurtful sometimes. Words , as sharp as needle ; thoughts , as deep as the ocean . I do ignore stuffs people say , thoughts about me or things that hurt , but the fragile side of me couldn't hold any longer when that particular confusion comes swirling in my head.

I am not as strong as what they think.

I should just let my heart out instead of burying those thoughts deep within. I feel insecure , really. My confidence is tumbling down day by day. Is this inner war ?

Let bygones be bygones ? Nope. I should stop being a goddamn coward and start learning from the past mistakes I made. Life's so imperfect so I guess I should stop blaming myself for all the failures and conflicts.
Yes , I can do it with God's will.

Laugh all the troubles away , regardless the tears that may roll . Cherish every second that's worth remembering. Love the ones who love you back , not fake scumbags . Pretend we've never met or talked before - let's be strangers again.

No , I'm not gonna be emo-ing over you . I'll look like a wimp doing that .

:) I feel good.

Sunday.

Happy father's day , dad . Love you ! 

As usual , it's just another typical boring Sunday. I was studying Accounts when I slept halfway all of the sudden. Like what ? My friends? I was wondering where the heck they are. Facebook's so quiet... The house is even quieter. And the weather's hot as fuck.
I don't really have the mood to do anything I'm doing right now. I feel lazy inside. I need MOTIVATION.

Come on , Jean. You can do it.

Yeah , all I need is another round of sleep.

no matter it's mother's day or father's day , I feel blessed for having such great parents :) Mummy and Daddy , thank you for showering me with love , common sense , sarcasm , crappy yet funny jokes , fun and etc. for 17  years of my life. I will live up to your high expectations because I know , that's the reason why I'm born. I love you guys <3

Freedom of speech?

Konichiwa ^^

My results for midterm is like OMG. I just can't take a look at it. I nailed it :( Never mind , I'm not gonna talk about disappointments anymore. It affects my mood badly. But I'll consider applying for Sunway Scholarship although it's not perfect straight A's :/

                                           May I present to you , the freedom of speech.

Freedom of speech becomes one of the most talked issues especially after the 13th General Election. Is it a good , or bad thing? In my opinion , freedom of speech is the freedom of voicing out your thoughts on all aspects. It's a part of democracy. Sadly , democracy has 'died' and autocracy is taking over. I'm not being political here , but isn't it an interesting issue to be discussed? Some parties always say , freedom of speech is indeed important in improving a certain aspect that is considered not satisfying . People have the rights to voice out , but what I can see is their rights are robbed . And so we're going back to the feudal era..

Sooner or later , freedom of speech will be banned from being discussed in school. One day. Yes , we do have the rights to say what we are feeling inside , but do we THINK before we speak ? Have we ever consider the feelings of others? Most of us don't.

The reason why I'm bringing this topic up is because it's a hot issue in my school. Someone mysterious created a confession page of my school on Facebook. The students can confess their thoughts as they appear anonymous , which sounds like fun. WHEEE!

Nevertheless , the fun did not last long. The teachers found out :o HOLY MAMA ! And there goes conflicts -.- Never ending arguments wtf.

Why can't school life be peaceful and fun? I feel miserable. Just wanna graduate as fast as I can lar. I'm not siding any parties cz I'm the neutral type of person who wants peace. Speaking of being rational , I did some thinking from every aspect . Yesh I'm too kepo to mind other people's business lol. Neither of the parties are right. Let's make it 50-50. Freedom of speech ftw ! However , some students misused their rights and went too far . The "other party" ? What they said makes some sense but it sounds like freedom of speech should be prohibited to them. So much for concealing the ugly truths.

Conclusion , let's sit back and watch :) I am definitely on the fence. Not to say I'm gutless but I'm still a kid and I should know my limits. Kids can never beat the adults -.- Our arguments are always referred as 'invalid'.

Stuffs.

 

<3

 

Hi , Miss Procrastinator updating bloggie here ! :)

I was suppose to complete my accounts project now , but I really have the urge to write something. Nothing important , it's a satisfaction :)

Happy Dragon Boats / Duan Wu Festival to all the Chinese in the world . Yay , dumpling ! *shrieks* It's not as merry as it used to be last time , but you really can't resist the dumplings . Food porn haha .

As usual , time passes by so fast. It's been a week since school reopened . My midterm results ? *pulls a long face* My dog's poo can do better.

Some people might think it's really unnecessary for me to mourn over my results just because an A- is already good. Well not for me. I'm not being greedy or whatsoever but it's the satisfaction that matters. SATISFACTION. I get disappointed when I'm not satisfied. Problem?

Tsk. I don't think I have hope for Malay Language in the coming SPM , unless there's miracles....

According to my countdown widget , there're 146 days left for SPM. Uh-oh. I'm actually proceeding with the idea of studying everyday , but look what I'm doing now. Sitting in front of that dammed lappie ranting about randomly useless stuffs online. SOMEONE PLEASE SHOOT ME.

Can't really believe my eyes that I'm chosen to be one of the committees in charge of graduation night . O.O I'm in charge of batch song so am I considered a DJ ?LOL.

My civic teacher , Pn Siti Noraini or "kai ma" like what we usually call her among ourselves , requested each one of us to throw her a party at school after we graduate next year . She requested a lorry of durians from me . LOLOLOL. Is that even possible? Maybe not , but I think cakes and other yummy stuffs will do . I was really touched when she said that she has full confidence in my batch for SPM . Aww....that's really sweet. Other teachers thought we're the worst batch ever somehow. =.=
Nope , I think my batch is the coolest :)

 

Procrastination

4 months and 27 days left. Someone please shoot me. Only if procrastination is a school subject....I'll be acing it. 

SPM is so near that I can't breathe. But why ? Why am I procrastinating ? D:

AARRGGHH!!!

Never mind. From tomorrow onwards , I shall turn on my nerd mode and study. *fingers crossed* Sometimes I think I'm diagnosed with ADHD. I can't focus at a specific thing for long..Look there's a butterfly ! 

Does timetable even help ? Okay , let's nail this . I shall polish my worse subjects : Biology , Morale , Malay and History . These are the dudes that worry me all the time , although I always get A+ for history X) Thanks to sir for the exam tips LOL.

This is what I've planned just now.

Monday - Accounts
Tuesday- Chemistry
Wednesday - Physics
Thursday - Biology and Maths
Friday- Add maths and Malay
Saturday - English and History
Sunday - Morale ? Hahas , I wanna relax :(

Messed up

What a coincidence to see you today. I must be jinxed -_-

Hate ? Neh , not really LOL.

The very last day of my last school holiday . I'm gonna enjoy it to the fullest . No , I'm not touching any books today :) I'm gonna sit my ass down and wait for tomorrow. Yikes ,  I wonder if my teachers finished marking all the papers . Maybe not :/ I don't need heart attack at this young age.

I can't believe it . I keep thinking of life after graduating from high school and completing my SPM. It's like just too early to be excited. I have a lot going on my mind lately. What to do after SPM , which college to attend , etc. Haih.

Expectation

Reality

Life's a bitch. Bring it on , I have lots of unfinished business after graduating ;) 

Raindrops.

" All I hear is raindrops , falling from the rooftop.."

It's been raining since early morning , and I could feel the cool morning breeze :)
I love rain . It's such a nice weather , especially when it did not rain for almost a month -_-
At least I could sleep with my blankie now :)

Last month was terrible . The weather was terribly hot that I sweated even when the air-cond's on. I couldn't sleep at night because of the sweat that made me sticky . Even my blankie's warm like hell.
Climate changes is one of the most talked issue nowadays . Speaking of global warming and stuffs , I don't think anyone could solve it. It can only be PREVENTED , unless someone's a god lah. LOL.

Rain reminded me of many songs and scenarios from movies . Like dancing in the rain , kissing in the rain , proposing in the rain , and etc. I must have watched too many movies. They'll never happen in reality , right ?

For songs , it reminded me of  ' It Will Rain ' by Bruno Mars . Yes , this is what I've been waiting for :D RAIN !

There's another classic - ' It's Raining Men ' by The Weather Girls . Well , the group's name explains all .

Another heart-rendering song , ' Officially Missing You ' by Tamia but I prefer Jayeslee's cover :) In case you are missing anyone when the rain is pouring.

"I should be over all these butterflies , but I'm still into you ." 

Whatever. Anyway , great song Paramore .

*scratches head* I don't what to say . I feel my walls crumbling down. I'm not being myself anymore. Have I fallen into the 'forbidden' pit ? :/ Everyday , confusing thoughts swirl around my head. I'm already confused , but you are confusing me even more.

" Never toy with feelings of the others . You may win the game , but alas , you'll end up looking like a fool. " 

So yeah , I'm dumbfounded. Btw , do I seriously look like those typical girls? Na-uh . I'm a survivor, bitch.

It was actually a wise decision , when I stared at you and just walked away without uttering a word . I find it hard to open up my mouth as I keep thinking of what you told me . As if they were funny -.- My dog can do better. 

And the three words you told me , or rather MESSAGED me , they aren't true right ? I know you're just trolling me :) But I just-

These words are serious matter to me . Think before you speak , boy :)

Of friendships and sheep

Rachel's birthday . Hmmm. I gave her a message in a bottle during the pre-celebration we had on Thursday with the guys . It's kinda old-fashioned writing sappy letters but I failed making her cry -.- Maybe it's not touching or it's just too funny .

5 years of friendship , what can I say ? Happy birthday , Gorilla :D

                                               Queen of all gorillas , Rachel Yee :)

On top of that , she's also the Queen of Gossip .

 

Our whacky times :)

 

 

Happy seventeen . You're old , lady X)

 

 

Meh.

10 minutes to midnight. * tick tock tick tock * .
I was supposed to sleep but Thursday's badminton energized me. Yea , sports is good for health except for those aching muscles -_-
It's still Saturday now so..

The day after tomorrow . My birthday ? Noope . Someone's getting married ? Noope .
It's doomsday . School  , bitch .
I don't really hate school like some kids do , I mean , high school has got swagger compared to primary school . Primary school is definitely bullshit . Not condemning my primary school but there were tales which make me think it sucked , A LOT .

I'm not repeating what other high-schoolers have to say about high school . Repeating is for sore losers :p Peace out yo .

Let's talk about holidays . Why did it end so fast ? Not that I was actually having fun during the hols but my sore ass is just too lazy to be carried to school :) Fuck that accounts project .

Yay for holidays , nay for results D:

I don't think I'm gonna achieve what I'd targeted before midterms ( 8 A+ ) and Biology sucks , to the max . I spent days staying up till midnight to study subjects I kinda dislike . For hate is such a strong word . Then I'll go to bed , wake up at 3 in the morning to study again -.- I WAS DEPRIVED OF SLEEP .

Great , it's 12 D: Sunday ! Shit .

My first entry ?

I'm not gonna start this in a formal nor informal way , let's just make this simple :)
Well, this is basically not my first blog - it's my third blog ._____.
What should I say hmm ? The reason why I created this blog because I feel like doing it all over again :) And secondly , I have a lot in my mind but I just can't tell anyone directly :/
Yea , I need a medium to express what I feel inside .

Cheers to my first post ! :D

" I want people to like the real me." - Perks of Being A Wallflower

That's what I was thinking. Do people like me because of WHAT I am , or WHO I really am ? Teenage quirks . Haha X) We shall discuss about this in the next post .

xoxo